As I’ve watched Zelda grow and really begin to play and interact with other kids (both her age and beyond), I started to think about something that I hadn’t in a while. What does it truly mean to share the sacred relationship of a best friend with someone? I mean this is the person that you are declaring to be your closest ride or die and to whom you’ve committed to have a profoundly deep and important relationship with. When we were younger it seemed like our BFF’s would change with each passing summer.
There were many important factors that would come into play when choosing just who would fill this spot including, who lived next door, who you shared the ride to softball practice with, who was going to the same summer camp, and possibly most importantly, who loved Punky Brewster as much as you?! At that point in time, those were the most important things in our lives. In these days we maintained our bond with special handwritten coded letters passed along between classes, long phone calls after school and our deepest secrets shared while at a sleepover. And of course, the coveted BFF necklace!
Fast forward twenty years. You have a full time career, children, and well lets just say shit got real and you are very much living this thing called life with real adult issues. There’s no time for those two hour nightly phone conversations and handwritten notes, though we do find ourselves missing them. Maintaining those special bonds can be tricky, especially in today’s world. It’s so easy to fall back on those tight relationships as validation to make an excuse that you don’t have time to call because you need to get the baby down, or make dinner, hop on a plane for work, basically the list can go on forever if you let it.
Recently I read a quote, “We have to learn how to redesign our patterns and communication to bridge the gap,” and it really got me thinking. What can I rework in my life to make more time for my friends and most of all my best friend? While I may not be able to stay on the phone for hours, I can use my 20 minute commute to call and ask how she’s doing. Shooting her a text with a funny picture that reminds me of one of our inside jokes will make us both laugh and brighten our days. Small actions say a lot, and help keep that bond strong.
One way I’ve chosen to keep the friendship strong is to give my ride or die a BFF necklace. The nostalgic aspect feels so perfect for our bond, they were huge when we were growing up! This one by Iconery is great because it’s simple and gorgeous, which is true of all their pieces. Every time it’s worn it brings back all the memories we’ve made together, and all those that are to come.
If you’re as in love with this Best Friends Necklace as I am, you’re in luck! Iconery is generously giving one away to one lucky winner! If you’re not familiar with Iconery, it’s time. They have beautiful fine jewelry for all tastes and styles. The pieces are stunning layered or worn alone, and after one look I think you’ll find they’re exactly what your wardrobe is missing! While they do have their own line of pieces, they also pull in some super rad designers like Luv AJ and Stone Fox Bride, to name a few.
This beautiful Best Friends Necklace in 14K yellow gold is valued at $825.00, and you can enter by answering the following question in the comments below:
What’s an easy and fun way you maintain your bond with your best friend as you move through adulthood?
Entry Deadline is April 22, 2016 8pm CST and you must be at least 18 years of age and a U.S. resident to enter.
Beccy E.
We use Snapchat a lot to keep in touch. It’s such an easy way to send a quick hello or share updates with friends without having to carry on a lengthy conversation(..hey, it’s hard sometimes!). Me and my best friend/twin sister know that, even though we live in different states and are enduring different life events, we are always there for one another and share a bond that nobody can break. We are constantly sharing photos with each other and making each other laugh on Snapchat, keeping that bond strong and staying a kid at heart as we move through adulthood.
Amanda
I live in Springfield and my super fashionable gal pal lives in Chicago. We see each other pretty regularly at the Capitol for work during Session but when we can’t hang out through work or visit on the weekends we send each other hand written notes on stationary. There is something so fun and personable getting a piece of old fashion snail mail on beautiful and artistic paper. Most of the time our correspondence is filled with humor but occasionally when one of us is having a hard time we go for uplifting and somewhat sappy! I am so grateful to have her in my life and relish our old school pen-pal antics!!!
Lauren Elaine
We have spent our entire adult friendship living many states apart so although we text, snapchat, FaceTime, etc. all day, nearly every day, we make it a point to visit each other every year. We also mix up the time of the year to enjoy different weather conditions. This last winter, we went to NYC for the first time ever! It was so special to have that experience together and we’ll never forget it.
Alexandria
My best friend kendall lives in Iowa City and i live in Des Moines Iowa were 2 hours apart, but the most special bond that we have ever had is when we lived together. We got through some really tough shit from me , being almost homeless to understand all the things he faced . One thing that keeps us connected is texting, and now snap chat. Plus our love for fashion really kept us going . We are now able to communicate more than ever and i really enjoy that. I have had a hard time in my adult life making friends, and good friends at that. He came along and it was like i found my best friend / soulmate someone that was like me in so many ways. Its really hard for me to talk about with out getting emotional. Because the bond is so real its scary. But we both agree we love marc jacobs and we are big rupual fans. We enjoy staying in touch by sending each other gifs and memes.
Nicole Ellis
My best friend and I live in two different states but that doesn’t get in the way of keeping our “wine Wednesday” tradition going. Every Wednesday possible we have a glass (or three) of wine and catch up via phone/FaceTime! It’s such a vital part of our friendship and makes girls night still possible even though we live hundreds of miles away from eachother!
Amy Conner
I’ve had my sister from another mister in my life since we were awkward pre teens. Unfortunately, life dragged her away when we were in middle school…of course this was all pre social media so it was hard to stay in touch. We found each other 9 years ago and met back up. It’s true, all the stories your Mom tells you growing up; if it’s meant to be, you’ll find each other again when the time is right. For us, not a moment of time in our friendship had been lost to our personal growth.
Now, living only an hour apart, we do our best to plan around t-ball games and work, but it doesn’t always happen. The important thing we both understand is how important time for YOURSELF is even with the responsibilities of life. We always have “mom dates” that typically involve alcohol, but the time to connect and more importantly vent is why we love it. That is why she is my best friend right?!
Candice Jacques
My best friend Marie and I have been best friends for the past 13 years when I excitedly announced I got my first job at “The Lob” aka Red Lobster in history class!! She was not amused-quite the opposite actually, but I had a car and we worked at the same place so an instant friendship was born. Who knew that friendship would last a lifetime. A decade ago I moved to Chicago from Olathe, Kansas and leaving my entire family to move to a big city was insanely scary, but my heart craved more than what Kansas was giving me. It’s HARDDDD staying in touch. Now we have skype wine dates on our phones weekly but that technology wasn’t so readily available. We both are “old school” so care packages and postcards are an absolute must! I mean, who doesn’t LOVE getting mail?! I don’t know if you remember Kids Mix Munchies, they are the bomb.com and unfortunately are no longer manufactured. Consequently Marie sends me a care package fully loaded with homemade kids mix munchies with extra M&M’s, and other goodies! We both love sending care packages fully loaded with funny cards and old embarrassing PRINTED photos!! VOXER (a walker-talkie app) has literally changed our lives! It’s so cool to be able to instantly send her a little message at any time throughout the day! It’s the perfect pick me up. And as always call, text and obsessively like each others FB/IG posts!